i am like the queen of england

first of all: charlie sheen has lost it. but he has found a drug that doesn't show up on a drug test because he was high as a kite last night on that interview.

second of all: i want a solid couple name with richie. if you have a good couple name its a good indicator of how compatible you are. right? i'm not sure how relationships work.

does anyone have any ideas? here are the possible flavor combinations that we have come up with thus far (richie and natali(e)*)

1) richie (rich + ie) richie came up with that

2) natali (nata +ie) i came up with that

*or purposes of this exercise pretend my mother spelled my name in the traditional manner it makes more sense

if i didnt have self control

something i like about the new year: you are allowed to write down the wrong year because you havent adjusted.

something i hate about the new year: you are only allowed to get the year confused with the prior year.

this is my old bike it got stolen. someone(s) stole it. probably for drugs. and by drugs i mean a pack of cigarettes because thats all your getting for my shitty pink bike.

take that thieves!

they took it.

other things that have been stolen of mine include: my other bike. yes thats right i have already been victimized. i refuse to attach to another bike ever again. my new bike is great (not pictured). but i refuse to love it. so jaded.

well enough about my trust issues. i have a cough that i trust will never go away.

90210! ive been waiting for this day forever

and it finally came.

i guess i should probably talk about my favorite 90210 episode. its gotta be every episode about donna being a virgin. she was a virgin forever. in fact, i stopped watching around the time she got birth control so she is a perma virgin to me.

other important things to note: im back in school.

also, eat at chuck a rama on these days: sunday and thursday.*

avoid the other days and go to the sizzler instead. you can get a baked potato with the salad bar. i hear.

*international foods is monday but isnt as international as one would hope. sauerkraut is strangely placed in chuck wagon day. breakfast is never offered but there is currently a movement (of which i am not involved) to change this.

mutual recission

oh dear. one of the students forgot what day the potluck was and brought her homemade enchiladas early. i quizzed her for the recipes but she kept saying "secret" and "top" --not in that order. but i did learn sort of how to make homemade tortillas. i fumbled over that sentence like i will surely fumble over making them. cornmeal and water and mixing and pressing. to be fair its not rocket science. and, although criticized for my weight i managed to eat twice as much as anyone else.

i have a fondness of the unexpected. i didnt come up with that someone said that about my writing and after those enchiladas i agreed.

this blog may become a cooking blog. or. maybe its always been one.

im her mom...no shes not!

occasionally i like to share the occasional work story. this story is a work story in a work story. so i guess i am really just telling a parable.

yesterday at a work meeting we were discussing the recent sexual harassment seminar some of the students put on to make the other students aware of sexual harassment. so the seminar was during class. upon finding this out and seeings that i didnt have to teach i got the hell out and went and watched tv on my computer. duh. anyway, my coworker was like natali how come you just left. and i was like duh. she was like i thought we had to stay. and i said next time you ever find yourself in that situation say hells no and go watch tvs on your computer. duh.

anyway she realized i was right. but the best part was the conversation that happened DURING the seminar (about sexual harassment)

student in charge: so you should come sign this i wont bite
other student: unless you want him to
student in charge: oh yeah then i would totally bite (wink or something)
other student: i bet he is good at it, yeah baby (what not)

(something else sexual was said but i wasnt there this is all hearsay)

moving onto more important matters i decided i would try to eat a veggie dog everyday this summer. this is day three. upon telling bry my seasonal dietary goals he said:

Bryton: I think you'd get sick of them after four days

me: i think i got sick of them after the thought

we were both right really.

up and down dates

in recent news i went camping. its really impressive if you have ever met me or know anything about me. whats even more impressive is that my friend matt was eating dinner and he said do you want to go camping tonight and i said yes (see how spontaneous i can be). and then i actually went (and dependable). and i didnt complain the whole time (such a trooper). and i have sent him like three texts saying remember what a good camper i was?(he probably mostly remembers how he had to do everything for me including zipping up my sleeping bag, telling me stories to get me to sleep, and how he had to do everything that involved "set up" or "take down"). so i sort of think at this point he is regretting the whole thing.

unpaid vacations and the like

i have all this information stored away in my brain about things i find interesting. but forgot to write about. first of all, this conversation happened at my new and exciting teaching job in the faculty room.

man: (gay)(not that it matters)(on the phone with another gay man)(not that is matters): i mean its just that i care about you so much. PAUSE. but i care about you. PAUSE. but i dont want to have sex with you. PAUSE. but i care about you. i really do care. PAUSE. but i just dont feel that way anymore. i dont want to have sex. PAUSE. but i care. and i just put something in your box. PAUSE. i really care.

hang (hung?) up.

thats when i realized the other guy who is super cared about also worked at the school.

i really wasnt going to press this subject. i am not sure what the etiquette is on listening to another persons conversation you cant get out of without physically moving. but my co worker wanted me to know that once you had the milk you dont want to buy the cow. (does that mean he was bad in bed?). really i thought that analogy only applied to girls trying to get married. so it was good to have it used in another context which broadened my own usage of it. i am never going to milk a co worker. i know thats a bad idea. now i worry about my milk being any good.

damn that conversation stressed me out.