Saturday, May 26, 2007


i received an email recently about a post. this post. the email was entitled "TAB", excerpts of the email include this:

I am a recovering TAB addict (since they switched from saccharine to aspartame in 2003 I lost my craving. I'll drink it every now and again, but it has lost its stronghold on me...In its original incarnation, the TAB your mother denied you truly was a superior beverage. I think you would have liked its artificial sweetness and the warning label that used to be on every can describing the carcinogenic effects of saccharine on laboratory animals. Every can invited a sense of danger and risk, not to mention an generous helping of caffeine. With your latest musings on that healthy diet coke, I can tell that you are not afraid of a little risk in your beverages. Each can also brought a sense of separation from society..."who the hell still drinks that stuff anyway?" -- I do.

yes thank you for your email. i appreciate your insight into addictions/ health/ marketing/ identity and maybe religion. but i am not sure i would agree that i would have ever enjoyed TAB. i never cared for saccharine/nutra sweet/ or splenda. especially splenda. i hope for a splenda free world for my children. also i dont know that i agree that drinking soda creates a sense of separation from society. i believe people drink soda to gain acceptance and built repore (officially spelled rapport but i have shunned this spelling). diet coke is a social drink. the coffee of mormon women. if anything it increases your sense of belonging. when i am in relief society and desperately trying to relate i like to bring up diet coke. when i am trying not to relate i talk about my job.

that wasnt the only email i received that day. this was in my inbox from a former roommate: entitled "i like you"

When you lived with me I had a lot of fun
you would put me in your car and drive me around
you wanted it to be burning hot
and i did not (edited for content)
we watched project runway
you took me to taco time
when i was poor you fed me
when i was naked you clothed me
actually you (edited for content)
remember when we laughed all the time
and you got ready
and i showered (more editing...)
eating at judds
you sipping on a diet coke
you would also sit around and analyze works of art like dreamy abc and russian amber art
and bag on ****

that email-poem, in its entirety, is a masterpiece. but it was del taco and not taco time. so maybe i should have edited for accuracy... anyway,thanks for writing to me. it nice having an email every now and then that isnt from eharmony (that was sort of a mistake)(i did it to get the personality assessment)(but it was too damn long and i didnt even care by the end).

1 comment:

Colls said...

oh wow. i feel so popular. i wish my initials were kc. so i could be kc masterpiece.