boys are dumb

people are always so down on technology and so am i.

what an interesting time and place u choose

the bag has been out for a really long time. about two weeks ago i decided i missed it and wanted to resurrect it from the blog cemetery where i buried it some time ago. however, two weeks ago i realized when i killed my blog i set a series of traps in case i was tempted to bring it back to life i couldnt. but, i finally figured out my password and username and where i put it and wah law*. i didnt say it was an exciting process but it took all my computer skills and a fair amount of patience.

also, i thought of waiting until nov 18 the last day i posted so it would be a whole year but then i thought natali you were going to stop being so sentimental that was so the first 30 years of your life. (i am dangerously sentimental with very little poetry to show for it). i really dont know when i made that resolution but i suspect it was september. and, i have considered long and hard about what trait i would substitute for sentimentality. although becoming more stoic was a brief consideration becoming the opposite of an unwanted trait is not always the answer. so i chose industrious. which is why i have time for this blog.

*my spelling has not improved

contributing to america

me: did i tell you i got a fish pedicure?
dad: what in the world is that?
me: you stick your feet in an aquarium and the fish eat the dead skin off.
dad: that sounds like something someone came up with when they were drinking something. (i think he was implying alcohol).
me: its from asia.
dad: then someone's drinking in asia.

i like mice

i actually dont like mice that much. they are ok. i was telling colls that i was going to post a blog about how when you turn 30 you get a lot of cake. i told colls i was going to call my next blog 6 cakes and she said really shouldnt it be called i like mice or something? i said good point. also i technically only had 5 and one of those todd just made for a dinner party and brought over the delicious remainder BUT i got a candle and a wish so i counted it.

this one was festive.

this one contained tasty TAB (compliments of elin) and it says NAT when turned the correct way.

bean helped me blow out the candles. truth be told i did all the work.

and this was my work cake although technically no one was in the office to enjoy it so i just sent it home with a co worker.

todd's delicious rose water something cake.

and im thirty.

cigarette quilt

oh new exciting quilting blog.

i dont want anyone to think i promote smoking.

but its just so long and skinny.

i think it would be good for watching movies on a couch.

or maybe other things.

where does creamed corn figure into the universe

fight threw an excellent pumpkin party.

my favorite was clif's. he let me paint the dinosaur's mouth red. clif might be my best friend.

i think maybe fight used gum to fix his eye patch.

stefano was my second favorite costume. he was this guy.

but elin was my favorite as this lady.

communists! i think. i really dont know whats going on.

im so glad halloween is over.

i have the wrong zip

i missed my cousin emmy's birthday. i know because i had this conversation with her yesterday.

me: i called you fifty times* why didnt you answer. i had a pumpkin cookie disaster/miracle.

emmy: yeah sorry i have twins.

me: oh yeah thats right. (i went on to explain in depth how i lost half of the pumpkin cookie recipie and had to improvise and ended up adding extra eggs, pumpkin and salt and guessing on all the dry ingrediants AND it turned out ok) (its a long story)(but i think i tell it well).

emmy: that is a miracle.

me: i know right. its my birthday soon.

emmy: oh yeah when is that.

me: oh no i just realized its the end of october. i missed your birthday.

emmy: its fine i can never remember if yours is the 5th or 6th.

me: its the 3rd. what day is yours. the 18th? the 25th?

emmy: you are just kidding right?

me: the 23rd. its probably the 23rd.

emmy: the 20th.

happy birthday emmy.

*i really only called 3 times but i called rose another 4 times so it felt like fifty combined.

dogs can be angels but probably arent.

my father, in a fit of sentimentality, which he later admitted, told me thinking back i wasnt that high maintenance after all.

strange because all i have been thinking about is getting a new bed and tv. and i want nice ones not crappy ones that are hard to sleep on or ones that are bright and orange.

well that isnt all i have been thinking about. i have also been thinking long and hard about my skin. i think if my skin was better everything in my life would be fixed. that might be a paranoid delusion. but i dont think it is. i think really if my skin was better everything in my life would be fixed.

my pants have pockets

i talk to myself a lot when i am sewing. i think its pretty normal. you know. its nice to bounce ideas off people even if its just yourself. i never really got nervous about it until i had this conversation (in my head):

me: i think i want this quilt to be primarily solid squares.
me: yeah me too!

hmmmm. that might explain why i have been wanting to watch sybil lately.

everyday im in the whitehouse

jo and i went to a quilt show in odgen.

i liked this transportation one.

i liked this circly one.

i liked this one too. and i learned a 14 year old made it.

i have a strong preference for squares (in boys and quilts). anyway after the show we ate at taco taco. the end.

holiday greetings from the bags out

i got a new hair cut...

and my celebrity look a like is...

arent you just full of comments.

i had a dream last night. i was at a hearing and the judge spoke a different language. i am always nervous judges will ask me things i dont know and i wont be able to bull shit in a timely manner. however, i found it much less intimidating when the judge couldnt speak english. i remember wearing a grey suit and telling the insurance company (represented by a girl in my ward who used to teach sunday school) that their defense was racist.

this is sort of similar to the actual hearing i had today. except for no one was racist and the judge spoke fluent english. i know because we had this interaction.

Judge: Do you know the location of your client?
me: i dont know. but i think he is in argentina.
judge: What have you done to locate him?
me: i asked his friends. they think he is in argentina.
Judge: Are you really comfortable settling your clients case without consulting him?
me: yes. (i dont sweat this kind of stuff).
Judge: (awkward silence).

the only really exciting part was before i was up to discuss how i dont really care about client rights someones cell phone went off and the lady actually answered and started talking. i saved the day by telling her she should leave. i think you can get fined for shit like that.

and your IM.

i have actually been sewing a lot but this is my one finished project for the summer. everything else is in various stages of almost done.

this is a new baby quilt for tabitha. she is one of my favorite babies. i think maybe i will just ask her parents how they feel about cloning. anyway, i gave her the quilt and she looked pretty happy about it.

hey i got your post it

like all not-really-serious blog writers who only sort of like their blog i occasionally think of ideas to make it better. in fact i had this conversation (in my head) with david foster wallace just today:

n: first of all can i just say how sorry i was to hear you died.

dfw: oh really?

n: yeah. i really liked your stuff. alot. it really affected me and how i thought about writing and really changed my point of view on a lot of things and shit. and you seemed great. just great. (im sorry im really nervous to even be having this fake conversation with you) (blush).
dfw: oh dont worry you are doing just fine. but i thought you only read three essays.
n: thats true. once i said i read infinite jest but i realized i thought it was another book. sorry.
dfw: dont sweat it. its too long to take seriously.
n: no no thats not it its just those vampire books came out and you know.... anyway, as a writer i really value your opinion, do you think there is anything i could do to possibly make my blog better?
dfw: more pictures.

i think dfw is probably right.

but i am willing to take other people's thoughts into consideration. for instance i came upon this comment on a post on someone elses blog about a post i had composed some time back.

Other than the stylistic elements that seem intended to drive readers away (centered justification, no capitalization, illegible blog title), I wouldn't be too concerned about it.

(thats exactly my approach. the concern part.)

...I read it as somebody incorrectly interpreting self-discovery as societal trend (as we are all wont to do at times). As I see it, the author is discovering her attitude towards an issue and then (apparently unbeknownst to her) projecting her internal thought processes onto the external world, resulting in her observing for the first time societal approaches to that issue -- approaches which were previously opaque* to her, since prior to such self-discovery she lacked the internal discernment requisite to perceiving such different approaches. Of course, the approaches are not recent; the only recent phenomenon is her self-discovery...

this part is less interesting. because it doesnt make much sense. but it sounds like something that should make sense and that always impresses me. probably because it reminds me of my job. anyway, if i am looking for more help (or perhaps some therapy for that self discovery process) with my writing i should probably just stick to dfw.

* i particularly like this sentence although i must say i didnt care for it the first couple of times i read it. it grows on you.

hey i got your email

this weekend i remembered this story:

when i was in law school i was talking to this guy i kind of knew. i asked about his baby and he said he was doing well. he said he was with his baby the other day and someone asked what the baby's name was and he couldnt remember. he sat there looking at the baby and thought "he is six months old i should know his name by now." i dont remember if he actually remembered or not or had to make something up.

anyway here is this picture. i like it. brian and gavin were too busy thinking about ghosts to look at the camera.

coughing up art

oh here are some new and exciting quilts coming from springville art museum. if you want to see the show it ends thursday.

this asian one is cute because its pieced with japanese fabric and quilted to look like pagodas.

kandinksy?

the rest of that awesome box sculpture that aaron doesnt appreciate. brian liked it. but he didnt blog about it. (this is not a quilt)

this reminds me of the old man and the sea.

shiny.

my parents liked this one.

the end.

hug a dolphin another day

august 29, 2008

dear m.l.k. jr:

im still not totally ok with you. you know my feelings. but im not bringing that up now because you are dead. however, i am curious if you really did endorse obama or if i misheard when i was trying to quickly change the channel. also, my tv sound didnt work for like 15 minutes last night and i want to know if you or any of your friends are haunting my tv set. that might also explain the color problems. everything is orange. good thing orange is my favorite color.

xoxo,

n

ps here is a picture of jesus on a birthday cake. i heard you are religious.

you have a lot of dance in those pants

i was never a big fan of miranda rights. not the actual rights themselves. those are fine. but the whole reciting thing. it doesnt have much to a ring to it. its not like the lords prayer which sounds great every time. however, after watching law and order i realized there is something i dislike more than normal miranda. its when whoever gets arrested starts rattling them off (because they are some lawyer or cop or repeat offender with a good memory) and they try to finish them before the cops. it takes too much time.

time wasting is a big concern for me. i also take the golden rule seriously. i try to never waste anyones time with things they hate or arent in the mood for or are only doing out of obligation. it reminds me of when people try to peer pressure me into doing things like wedding showers or campouts or drugs.

speaking of drugs i took some sleeping medication as i do every night and i forgot to go to bed because i was excited about aaron's new song. featured here. eventually the ambien caught up to me and i said "i think im going to have problems getting to my bed" and he thought i said "i think you are going to have problems getting to my bed."

thats a pretty good pick up line right? or maybe its not because it implies a boy would have problems getting into my bed because im a prude or there is an obstacle course or i kick in my sleep. i was thinking of it tonight at a party with ladyace when we were talking about hitting on boys. we talk about it alot. or in other words we are all talk.

i like to talk about those vampire books. everyone is really into book clubs. not me because i dont like to read much unless you count those vampire books. but i would like to form a vampire book club. any vampire book. i can think of five off the top of my head. fortunately i have all ready read them all so all the pressure is off.

small talk on my day off

i had this idea to start a blog about a hypothetical baby. but i have a lot on my blog plate. and the problem with hypothetical babies is you cant take tons of pictures of them (because they dont exist) and pictures are the keystone of any good baby blog. i was also concerned a made up baby blog might offend real babies (parents) everywhere. so this is as far as the brainstorming went:

brian: did you start you fake baby blog yet?

me: not yet

i dont know if i willbrian: that's ok

but here is an excerpt of what my baby blog would have been like.

i found this outfit for kitty.* isnt she adorable? she loves it and cries when i take it off. whenever we go to the park she gets so many compliments. its because she is so adorable. i cant believe how big she is getting! i hope she doesnt outgrow it by halloween but if she does i was i have a cute pumpkin costume that should work. anyway i have to run. the baby is waking up from her nap and we running to the store...

*not her real name.

sex on wednesday

at tuesday lunch with my parents my dad was telling me how proud my mom was of me. and i was like yeah right. and he said she is always bragging about you. and i said what does she brag about (i was secretly hoping she told everyone i was good at sewing* and had a great sense of humor even if i wasnt married). no such luck. she likes to tell people how small i am. i think if i lost a couple of more pounds i could maybe surpass my younger brother as the favorite who we are all very proud of because he teaches a class as UVSC. thats right he is a professor (adjunct). he is living the part time dream.

all my heros work part time.

ive decided im going to go get a physical this week. im not even really sure what it entails. i vaguely remember getting one when i was 13 and having this conversation with the doctor:

doctor: Have you talked to your parents about sex?
me: ugh yeah i guess.
doctor: Are you sure? If they havent I will.
me: maybe i should just pee in a cup and leave.

i havent been back since.

*originally i had written sewer. i realized that cant be right.